I’m sick and tired of this crap

I can’t handle being in classes any more. They’re pointless, I don’t learn anything, they’re way too expensive, and they take up too much friggin’ time and energy.
My job is so boring and mundane and mindbogglingly annoying that I just want to quit and go broke and become homeless.

But I cant afford to not be here because I make a decent wage, I make my own hours and I might still be able to get the $5000 tuition reimbursement to pay down my loan.
And I can’t afford to not go to classes because it’s too late to drop them so even if I wanted out, I wouldn’t get reimbursed and theres no more money to pay tuition with and theres no chance I could (or would want to) get another loan if I wanted to take them later.

I’m stuck and I hate it.

I just want to crawl into a corner and not come out until I can have a real life in a place where it doesn’t snow for eight months and a job that doesn’t make me want to commit suicide.

And if I can manage to stick it out and actually go to classes and do the work, I’ll have a god damn degree in March. Finally. But, it will mean keeping up this routine that I’ve so far tried for 2 weeks and not been able to handle, for another 8 weeks, plus finals …. Followed by an even more stressful schedule involving two classes on top of a 40 hour work week, for another 10 weeks, and then another round of finals. I honestly don’t think I have it in me.

And I know if I can’t pull it off I’ll never come back and finish my degree. No one will respect me, especially the people that I’m closest too. I’ll never get the salary that I deserve, and I’ll probably never be able to speak to my parents again (although that last part has it’s perks).

~This post transplanted from a misguided rant

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